Mercs on Mars Special Ep. 1
A guest voice actor plays one hell of a scary Russian hover-pilot
MERCS ON MARS PODCAST -
SECRET RUSSIAN COMMUNIQUES -
EPISODE 1: “Tell Me How To Do a Job Better”
This 1st Special Episode was
Voice-acted and Recorded by
My friend and Guest Star Stickman,
(or The Stickman as he better known on X [twitter]).
—> So be sure to give him a follow on twitter!
—> And give his new substack some love! ←
HEAR AND READ
THE EPISODE BELOW
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SPECIAL EPISODES -
(SECRET HOSTILE COMMS)
—> EPISODE 1: Tell Me How To Do a Job Better
INCOMING MESSAGE |!|!|!|!|!|!|!|!|
TOP SECRET. FOR FALCON EYES ONLY.
» Following the skirmish by Lonestar Mercs & Red forces at Jasper, HIN-RIN electron micro-burst comms have been intercepted by the Stellar-Texan Counterel Unit (STCU). «
SPEAKER: Second Lieutenant Personnel-Pilot
YEVGENY LUTSEV
Of the Imperial Crimson Navy - FILE STILL IN PROGRESS.
» LISTENER (UNABLE TO DECRYPT COMMS):
RED INTELLIGENCE OFFICER,
COMRADE COMMISAR
SERGEI “SPUTNIK”
GREGORIN III «
»TRANSLATION & TRANSCRIPT BELOW PROVIDED BY 4 LASSO AGENTS«
«BEGIN AUDIO»
Comrade Commissar, I must speak with you on an urgent matter.
It is amazing how the Blues defended their Dome today. Their Arc Tech, sir, has improved since the last time we tried to crack it.
Very thick bubble, indeed.
We were caught off guard. We did not expect to encounter Xenos.
This was a shock, and, forgive me for saying, sir, but, it was also the result of bad information from the Han intelligence Network.
I know! I know HIN and RIN have worked together for countless years. But I personally do not trust their AI Central Data servers any longer. *Your* own reports I trust… like Vladimir's Fourth Turn Memo, I keep zipped tight in my flight suit pocket.
This is why I broke the chain of command and came directly to you and you only with this fresh information, rather than deliver my report to Captain Ivan and his “superior.”
I am happy to report that the Xenos were killed by us and Texans both. No personnel on our side, Russian OR Chinese, were infected by the Xenos.
So the Red Colonial Army and the Crimson Navy did not come down with that, that... Anti-Tsarist Infliction. The Westerners’ Plague!
What is that you say? Oh yes! Yes, Comrade Commissar, the same... it was them.
The electron microburst came through before the battle, confirmed by my very own eyes as I fought the Blues.
They call themselves the "Dirty Dogs." They are mean mutts, indeed! Pffah!
Logan is their commander, a man named Forest. Forest, like their word for "green trees."
Our mission's failure came… came down to faulty data and the fact that we were outnumbered. They had us 10 to 6, Comrade Commissar.
If I may be so bold, sir, I have a question to ask. I do not understand why we hit the town called Yasper. Yasper is small.
Ehh, Jasper? Jasper, yes!
Yes, very small. Jasper is like Felix and Herstaad too. Three no account homesteads. Farms… and ranches.
…Why are we doing this? It makes no sense, and it makes… Western Plague Walkers more likely.
But I shall listen to you, of course.
What do your agents and botniks and satellites report now?
If you can tell me, I can pilot better, under Ivan's command. This is my promise! It is why I broke the chain of command in the first place and went straight to you.
Others may waver, their loyalties may be tested…
—But I remain dedicated to the Novits-Tsar and the Great Revolutionary Cause!
The red planet shall be Red indeed, and soon.
I live to serve the Imperial Crimson Navy. Tell me how to do a better job, and I do a job better.
I slash throats! Just tell me whose and when, and I can….
«END OF RECORDING»
