The River, The Murder, & Flannery O'Connor

Lyrics, background, and an old recording of my proudest original song

SONG: “THE RIVER,THE MURDER,
& FLANNERY O’CONNOR”
by Tyler Morrison

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AUDIO:

(Apologies for how quiet it sounds; old recording, old equipment, and I was not as skilled or confident in projecting my voice).

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LYRICS

The River, The Murder & Flannery O’Connor

Verse 1:

I went down to the river 
To find myself forgiveness; 
There wasn’t a preacher man 
In town.

Seeking to deliver 
Myself into the silence, 
I took off both my shoes 
And laid them down.

Chorus:

I plunged into the water
Not knowing what to pray. 
I plunged into the water, 
And it pulled me away.

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Verse 2:

I stumbled through the embers 
And struggled with the fear. 
The smoke rose up and told me 
Where to go.

I tried not to remember, 
But I couldn’t hold the tears. 
I cried as I beheld the banks 
Below.

Chorus:

I plunged into the water
Not knowing what to pray. 
I plunged into the water, 
And it pulled me away.

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Verse 3:

I burned my blood-stained jacket 
And scattered all the ashes. 
But the leaves above me whispered 
What I’d done.

I saw him in his casket; 
It couldn’t hide his gashes. 
It wouldn’t let me hide 
From even one.

Chorus:

I plunged into the water
Not knowing what to pray. 
I plunged into the water, 
And it pulled me away.

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Bridge:

I killed the man I hated 
And shuddered at the sound. 
The knife I borrowed clattered 
To the ground.

I’m breathing in the water, 
Purged by fire as I drown. 
The flood will wash away the awful——
Love will wash away the awful sound.

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Final Chorus:

I plunged into the water
Not knowing what to pray. 
I plunged into the water, 
And it pulled me away.

I filled my lungs with water, 
And it swallowed my disgrace. 
I surrendered to the river, 
And it pulled me away.

Final Verse:

I went down to the river 
To find myself forgiveness; 
There wasn’t a preacher left
In town.

I plunged in and I shivered 
But found a perfect silence. 
My soul swam on; 
My body just sank on down.

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BACKGROUND:

I wrote this song as a Sophomore at the College of Saint Thomas More. Most of the lyrics and music were composed over one night in the “music room” of the rectory. “Music room” is a bit of a generous description. There was a table and chairs, there was a whiteboard, and there was a piano. I brought my guitar, and wrote the lyrics on the whiteboard, and collaborated with another student, Thomas Beyer, on the piano for the melody. Sadly, there is no piano in the recording I later made, but I think it would add a lot.

From the beginning, I knew I wanted to make a song with a strong narrative. I wanted to tell a story. And the kind of story I wanted to tell was a Southern Gothic take on the Murder Ballad.

Violence and Southern Gothic go hand in hand, and my favorite author of the genre is Flannery O’Connor, hence her name in the title. She was a wonderful Southern Catholic author of the 20th century, and while she won some acclaim during her brief life, she is grossly underestimated now in literary circles and unknown to most casual readers. I thought of her stories and style and themes while crafting my narrative. Here are a few pertinent excepts from Wikipedia describing her and her work:

“Grace changes us, and the change is painful.” This reminds me of my favorite line in Greek Tragedy, from the Agamemnon by Aeschylus:

“From the gods who sit in grandeur
grace comes somehow violent.”

I wanted my tragic Southern Gothic song to fit that theme. More specifically, I wanted to use the image of drowning as a grotesque analogy to baptism.

My song was about a outlaw in the past, say a man of the Wild West or the turn of the century, a man, who, for reasons that never become clear, murdered the town preacher, but he became wracked with guilt as soon as the deed was done. He couldn’t talk this sin through with a pastor, as he had killed the only reverend in town.

So he leaves the town and civilization with it as he desperately searches for forgiveness and redemption, now in nature. But he still can’t find it, until he sees the roaring river below him. He sees the river as a source of punishment and judgment but perhaps also a vessel of grace and mercy. It’s holy; that’s why he takes his shoes off. And then he makes the decision to jump, not in despair, but hoping that in this final act of sacrifice God will sort him out.

It’s not theologically sound, but it’s dang good literature as far as I’m concerned.

A final note: You may notice the story is told in reverse. The first, second, and third verses, are turned around, chronologically speaking. The bridge is the earliest part of the story and closest to the last. I wanted the lyrics to play out like a mystery, and I was thinking of one of the better music videos by a certain band… Coldplay. “The Scientist”. (In my defense, the music video is far better than the song!)

I hope you enjoy my song :-)

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CHECK OUT MORE SONGS & POEMS by the author?

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